Homily for Hominy

Of all the places he thinks is ‘bizarre’, Andrew Zimmern decides to go to Wisconsin for his latest episode of Bizarre World. I don’t think the other half blinked once while we were watching it last night. The reigning world champion in log-running and rolling was Andrew’s guide at the Lumberjack World Championships. She went to high school with the other half.

Sunshine Cake

So I was minding my own business reading a comic book and lo and behold a recipe tracks me down. This is a cake from A Wizard’s Tale, the story of a nice wizard who is supposed to be evil and reign terror on the village below his castle.

My Little Dumpling

Here is the cute poster for this Sunday’s NYC Dumpling Festival:

Old-Fashioned

Today we were in Westfield craving a malted chocolate shake. While getting sandwiches at the Robert Treat Deli where they only have egg creams, I chatted up the cashier to find out why it’s so difficult to find a good milkshake in New Jersey. She referred us to her childhood favorite, Holsten’s, in Bloomfield.

Colonial Hip Hops

The other half’s Father loves beer. He turned me onto microbrews, which run rampant in Wisconsin, like coffee and chocolate-flavored beer. But the problem is it comes in such a large bottle, which is quite a challenge for those lacking alcohol dehydrogenase like me. This is why the new vogue of serving sampler sized portions at restaurants is great. It makes beer-tasting enjoyable and affordable, like the multi-vineyard wine-tasting spree we went on while we were in Cape May last weekend.

Mang Tomas: Man or Sauce?

My Filipino friend mentioned during our housewarming piglet-out that there’s a secret sauce that they use to accompany roasted pork: mang tomas. He was going to get me a bottle from the elusive Filipino market in the wilds of Queens, but I thought, why not try to find a recipe and make it myself?

Austrian Tea Room Staple

My vacation month is over…the other half is off traipsing upstate New York in the Finger Lakes region with Mother and I’m alone contemplating the last couple days of freedom before another long commuting month begins. Reflecting on some bad meals during these road trips, I realize I must live in a place where great food is easily accessible. An unhappy belly makes for cranky jeju. And that really ruins everyone else’s day.

A Cheesesteak Tour of Philly

We just returned from a short trip to Philly, as a respite in between camping trips, but mostly to finally eat some real cheesesteak! I’d never been to the City of Brotherly Cheesesteak, but the other half has. Suprisingly, the city is also filled with all sorts of wonderful ethnic nosh, and a Chinatown that rivals Manhattan. We may be moving out of the armpit very very soon…

Toan’s Egg/Spring Roll

Why are egg rolls called egg rolls? They don’t have eggs in them, unless you’re making the Taiwanese version which has strips of eggs, but then they are called popiah. There is also the fluted flaky pastry that is an egg roll, which either has eggs or yellow no. 5. Some say the huge carbo bombs you get at Chinese take-out places are egg rolls. Wiki says they are the ones dipped in egg wash after you wrap them up, before they’re fried.

Boss of Hoboken, or, Tale of Two Bakeries

This morning we ventured to Hoboken, boyhood home of high school dropout and only child Francis Albert Sinatra. They should really just rename the town Sinatraville. But it was not for a pilgrimage to visit the haunts of ol’ Blue Eyes we wandered into this tiny hamlet in the shadows across the Hudson. It was because I wanted to eat a lobster tail made by the Cake Boss.

The Ultimate Dessert Paradox

We just got back from a road trip to Vermont, the self-proclaimed home of the skinny pancake. Why they just can’t call it a crepe is beyond me, but unfortunately, any faint hope of a food grazing tour was sorely misplaced.

Pupusa a la Red Hook

Woe is us, we never made it down to Red Hook to sample the infamous pupusas with a side of methane. When the Two Hot Tamales said their favorite food to eat with their hands was a pupusa from a market in Los Angeles, we decided it was now or never, to make it ourselves, that is.

Gittin’ Jerky Wit It

In preparation for our upcoming road/camping trip to Vermont, the other half decided to make some beef jerky. After our car burst into flames last week, we didn’t know if we’d be going anywhere, but the Scottish Spanish-speaking mechanic across the street saved the day and now Phil P is purring like a two-week old kitty again.

Goa Goa Goane

Andrew Zimmern is Anthony Bourdain without the snide quips and self-loathing. Both are globetrotting former NYC cooks who eat weird things wherever they go on their respective Travel Channel shows. What a gig. I like to watch their shows for the secret ingredients that go into exotic dishes.

Lamb O’ McSorley’s

Did you know they serve food at McSorley’s Old Ale House? From all the stories I’d heard, it was just a bar, like Cheers, but more manly macho macho man, all sawdust and broom handle mustaches. Last night, we dropped in after wandering the East Village for a good long while.

bearmouse Savory Granola Bar

One time, bearmouse sent a bunch of us an email asking us to fill out a survey for a project her brother was doing for school. It queried our preferences when it came to eating nutritional granola/protein bars, whether we leaned toward savory or sweet. He was making a prototype of a granola bar with tea as the main flavor.

R.I.P. bearmouse

Last night we found out that our dear friend bearmouse died sometime last week. The when, where and hows are a bit murky, but the funeral is on Friday. I’m in shock. Angry at the injustice. Confused by the circumstances of what really transpired. Maybe in time, things will be sorted out.

A.B.C.D: Alton Brown’s Corny Dog

Ah…summer means Nathan’s hot dogs at Coney Island. The corn dogs are even better, plus the boardwalk and suburns on the nasty beach, what could be better? But the armpit is so far from the seaside carnival, time to learn to make our own. We turn to Alton Brown for his expertise on this one.

Goth Girl Carbo-Salad

It only took a couple of months, but I am officially sick of eating sandwiches. I need something new but easy to eat, something that will pack an energy wallop on the go. Goth Girl doesn’t know it, but she saved the day by sending me her Aunt’s tortellini salad recipe.

Iron Chef Jeju Edition: Isoyaki Duck Kidney

A couple of months ago, my Rock friend sent me a care package; inside were contained an ultra-limited micro edition T-shirt and two Aji Ichiban vacuum-sealed packages of soy sauce duck kidney with three gems in each. The latter were direct from Mother Rock’s recent trip to Taiwan, not available, that I’ve seen, in the American chains of the biggest Asian purveyor of preservatives.

Vegan Fart Bombs

Who likes to fart? C’mon, everyone out there should be raising your hands, or at least chuckling on the inside (while letting out a silent one). I’ve discovered the other surefire way to release some noxious gas: falafel made from dried chickpeas/garbanzo beans. Now, who’s up for a little methane liberation?

Birthday Mandoline

To: Jeju

From: Jeju

Re: Happy Birthday to Me

Too Much of a Good Thing

To celebrate my birthday, we sojourned to Sachiko’s on Clinton on Saturday. Our sake friend mentioned this place’s product as on par with Masa, which I assumed was the benchmark for Japanese food in NYC. Sachiko apparently had the inside loop on the same quality imported fish, but at more reasonable prices. We had high expectations.

Colonel Mustard

The other half heeded my clarion call for a better sandwich spread. Hence my new and improved lunches. This stuff clears the nostrils, adds layers of complexity and several octaves. Do not attempt a raw version; it leads to heartburn from the excess acidity. Take it from someone who’s been there.

Lil’ Tokyo via Seoul

Freedom! Time to roam the city. On Friday, we were invited by our sake friend to the preview of a new restaurant in the LES, aka Lil’ Tokyo. The Japanese food revolution has really overtaken that whole neighborhood, from dingy authentic ramen shops to Americanized anime-meets-manga modern establishments. May Chan Ramen and Robatayaki is one of the latter.

Tim Horton Ain’t Got Nut’in on This

Life is rough for a foodie when you gotta work. No time/$ to eat good fixin’s (partly cuz you’re forced to labour for free) or to make your favorite treats. The only thing I have plenty of time for is fantasizing about food combinations whilst riding the train.

Matryoshka Mash-up

It’s the home stretch for the other half. 1.5 weeks until the bar exam. Needless to say, being homebound is making us both a little batty. Even with the requisite TV breaks to watch our fluff cooking shows and NCIS marathons, we are gnashing our teeth from cabin fever. 

Small Town, USA

While it’s true that big box chains are taking over the country, there are still outposts of Ma and Pa outside NYC. You just have to look closely. These days, the closest Barnes n’ Noble from me is about 30 minutes drive away. On 1/9, there’s all the name brand stores you could ever ask for, but in walking distance from your house outside NYC, it’s downright country. I can hear the train whistle in the distance, and as Paul Simon says, who doesn’t love that?

Soy Unique

Settling into new digs requires finding the best local thrift store. The one most accessible downtown on Broad St. is the Unique Thrift Store, which, ironically, is a chain. We’ve scrounged amongst the racks on both gigantic floors for some lovely foodie goodies: a warming tray from the 70’s, a large cast-iron bacon press with a pig imprint, and our new pride and joy, a soy milk maker.

You Say Polenta, I Say Grits

The first time I had grits, I was in a Cracker Barrel in Florida. I have a thing about mush, so I never ate oatmeal or congee for breakfast when I was growing up. I had no idea about polenta or grits. But these were steaming piles of cheese grits in the trays, so I said, why not? I’ll give it the ol’ college try. Wow, seriously savory deliciousness.

Papaya Fleshshake

Done! Seems like for the past couple years, every time I finish a semester, I watch the latest season of Dexter, America’s favorite serial killer. To celebrate the end of boards (well, board, I decided just to take one instead), I expunged my brain again. This is the last weekend of freedom for me, for a year.

Holy Grail Pie

The search is over. We have eaten the best New York-style pizza ever, in Elizabeth, NJ: Santillo’s Brick Oven Pizza. It’s in a non-descript part of town, close to a fork in the road in front of a Korean church. You’d miss it if you blinked while driving by. Too bad it’s not in walking distance of our apartment.

To Boil or Not to Boil

The other half had a hankering for lasagna. I didn’t like to make it because it takes forever and the ingredients make it cost out at $20 or more, depending on how decadent you spree. Plus it drops like a brick into your stomach and gives me a sympathy bellyache. On top of that, I have a bone to pick with Italian food.

The Mighty Bean

Every time I eat beans and rice, I’m reminded how much I like it. The flavor is so complex, almost meaty, it satisfies the tiny crevices on the edges of my appetite. The other day, we had early Sunday dinner at the home of our Far Rockaway friend. We were scouting out the location of my future workplace.

Are You Mooking At Me?

Mook (or Muk) is one of my favorite appetizers. It sounds like dirty derogatory slang, but it’s actually Korean food, served in small bowls with the kimchi. Alt-kimchi. I first had it in Seoul, and while I tried to find it in NYC, it has been hard to come by. Once I asked for it in Koreatown and was given the evil eye.

Balthazar: Le Good, Le Bad, Le Ugly

It’s taken me over a week to process the disappointment that was the other half’s graduation dinner. Plus we’ve both been attempting to study for our respective boards and bar exam. But enough time has passed to permit this procrastination break.

West Siiii

We boogied to the Upper West Side with the ‘rents to hop on the Shack train. I still think ain’t nutin’ like a Corner Bistro burger. But after a waiter slam fest awhile back, its street cred has really tanked. Plus we were in the UWS for the diploma giveaway sweepstakes.

We Three Kings

For a co-worker’s birthday in Texas almost a decade ago, I made Tres Leches Cake. I don’t know what spurred me to do it, but I found a recipe in the local paper. It was one of the first cakes I made, since I’m not much into baking. I didn’t have proper equipment, just whatever was leftover at the house I was staying.

Smokey Jeju’s Cafe

The other half and Goth Girl hosted a graduation linner at our new pad yesterday afternoon. We threw the thing together in under a week, much to my anal retentive dismay. But it all turned out swell in the end, especially the dish of the year for which we transformed our beloved steamer into a smoker. The chicken didn’t know what awesomeness hit it. We now have a new secret weapon!

Tony Soprano Was Here

Everyone knows Little Italy is the Disneyland version of the real thing, devoid of any bite. The ambience at the corner cafes are nice on a spring or fall evening, but the food is just blah. In New Jersey, ‘Italian’ is all about the attitude. I wouldn’t know if it’s closer or further away from the real thing, but I know a dash of sleaze sells. Bada Bing.

Putting the Char in Kway Teow

I started this post several days ago, but then it was eaten by my hungry blog, so here goes nothing. One of the first things we must do when residing in a new city is to find the Chinatown. Lucky for us, Jersey is one of the states that does not have one. Maybe because NYC has 3, the powers that be decided people living in the armpit of America didn’t need one.

*Pop* Goes the Sicle

I’ve gotten sunburnt three times this week since moving to New Jersey. A heat wave means it’s time for popsicles. Lucky for us, the first night when we were sans electricity, we moseyed across the street to the Mexican deli for some Jesus candles and bought a local paleta on a whim (made in West New York!).

Roly Poly Deliciousness

….And we’re back! Miss us? We’ve been busy snuggling the armpit of America, yes, I know it is near and dear to your hearts, but yet you dare not venture into the heart of its darkness…New Jersey!  Fear not dear readers, we will still be eating abroad on the fair isle of Manhattan.

No Beans in This Town

This weekend we trekked to Boston to pick up our new used car, but not before eating our way through my favorite haunts of Cambridge from my college tenure. I hadn’t been back for several years, so it was nice to see the new and take comfort in the old. And I was determined to prove to the other half that New England is where it’s at.

Here’s Pie in Your Eye

When I got home from work the other day the other half surprised me with some lovely rhubarb from Fairway. Now the real market season has officially begun. Rhubarb is one of my favorite spring-y food stuffs, along with fiddleheads and morel mushrooms… oh spring, you do spoil me!

Oxtail sans Tail

Time to dip into the way back machine and pull out a recipe from a former co-worker from Zimbabwe. One of the first things I sought out when I moved to NYC was oxtail. Don’t know how I knew about it back then, but as luck would have it, when I worked at a certain giant chain electronics store downtown, the manager was all about hitting up Golden Krust for lunch.

New Pickle Tickle

The best part about going to school is the intermittent free food. It’s all about knowing where and when to peep. Keeping it on the DL is tough though, especially when you’re competing with the deans for the grub. The best part about going to a kosher school are the bagels and new pickles. People tend to ignore the condiments, so there’s more pickles for me!

Pee Tea

Our crew trekked to the Hudson today for lunch at Fairway, barely making it back in time to ride the Barone-y Pony, our prof’s name of himself. Ah, the self-deprecating Doogie Howser genius, my new hero! I’ve never enjoyed being in lecture for eight hours a day in my whole life. Weird, I know. So what did I discover today from a free sample? Kombucha!

Tropical con Grillz

For lunch a gaggle of us skipped over to a Dominican/Puerto Rican restaurant, Tropical Grill & Restaurant, the kind with those technicolor ghetto menus like the cover of homemade rap CDs. For $5 you get the pile of grub that’s typical of these cafeteria style places. It was the shiznit.

Pide Part Two

We decided to spend this sultry 90 degree day baking some Turkish bread! While baking, we inadvertently did a test of pizza stone vs cookie sheet as a vehicle for dough tanning. Results below, flavor – good. I sprinkled fenugreek powder into the dough, which added a cumin-meets-turmeric-esque ‘ethnic’ flavor to the chew. Nice…

Roller Derby Khubz

We have discovered the new wasteland of NYC in the Upper East Side. It’s a section between Lexington and 1st Ave, bounded by 86th and 68th street. The Old World authenticity has disappeared, replaced by trust fund kid stores like Big Drop and restaurants that Hamptons preppie types frequent when they’re pretending to go ethnic.

Milk Crumble Revealed

Thank God for the power of le Martha! She bribed Christina Tosi into giving up the secret to her $2 cookie/cake/manna. No more trips downtown just to fetch these crack babies.

Gimme EuroFinger

While von-traipsing the Upper East Side mid-morning, we happened by a Hungarian restaurant with a bakery in front. We had just scarfed down an Italian hero from a deli, so we were in the sandwich-y mood. For dessert then, we bought a quarter pound of one of my favorite cookies: mini-butter sandwich finger cookies dipped on one end with chocolate, sans Lil’ Italy sprinkles.

The Giant Poach

I’d never had a poached egg until last year. I grew up eating fried eggs. The best were in bento boxes we’d buy for train rides that came with sour preserved vegetables and braised minced pork on rice or the ones Mother packed in my daily school lunches. I liked the crispy whites and soft gooey yolk oozing onto the rice.

Eats at Mets

The other half haggled for some Brewers tickets last week from a co-worker with season tickets at Shea Stadium cum Citifield. Saved us $6 off face value. I’m so proud. With that extra change, you could buy one Nathan’s hot dog in the newly constructed brick behemoth which is surprisingly cozy on the inside. I tagged along to sample the eats.

Xipa Xips

Our bird-watching friend took us on a trip to Paraguay this afternoon, via Williamsburg at Tipico BK. I have never given a thought to this country or its cuisine, but said friend lived there for a stretch and has a thing for the local treats. What she described sounded like cheese on a bagel.

Woodside Thai: Stranded in Queens But At Least I’m Full

Today I took my final official set of pre-clinical exams until my national boards at the end of June. A decade ago, I vowed I would never set foot inside the halls of academia again. Ever. Maybe I shouldn’t make promises I can’t keep. This called for some major food binging to celebrate. The end of something…and the beginning of more of the same? We saddled up and somehow landed in Woodside, Queens.

Dumbos’ Tea Party

Are you and your friends dressing up in Revolutionary period garb and having a tea party tomorrow in honor of Anti-Tax Day? Are you drinking tea without any tea-type snacks for you and your friends to munch on? Crustless cucumber sandwiches are so 18th century British empire. Have no fear, jeju is here to save the day with three lovely hors d’oeuvres.

Melt-Aways Resurrected: It LIVES!

Our friend, Goth Girl, is a whiz at making alt-gingerbread houses; past projects include a Mexican adobe villa and a Venetian canal-scape. One time, she gifted us some Mexican wedding cookies wrapped in wax paper. The other half tasted them and exclaimed, “These are Melt-Aways, but with nuts and powdered sugar!” I asked naively, “What are Melt-Aways?”

Have You Seen Me?

The other half almost haggled today. There we were, downstairs at Goodwill, thumbing through the Woman’s Day Encyclopedia of Cookery, all twelve volumes, a complete set, stained yellow, nicely aged. It contains all you ever wanted to know about food and foodstuffs. The cashier wanted to charge us $1.99 per book, but that was not an acceptable Frugaler (my newfound term for ‘cheapskate’) price. I wandered away to look at a knick knack. Next thing I know, the other half is beaming, “I got them for $10!” How? “She offered them to me for that price.” I know, babysteps…

Goats and Kiwis Muffin’

Recently I’ve been putting goat cheese on everything. It’s replaced cream cheese as the topping for my bread. Smeared with Smuckers strawberry preserves on a bialy, it’s like an open-faced danish. Love the stinky funk, that light whiff of gamey goodness. Goat cheese is the poor man’s lamb, made even cheaper by getting it from East Village Cheese. Their cold case in front is usually stocked full of several different brands, all pennies compared to Zabar’s or Whole Foods where a small block can easily run $10.

Chicharrones cha cha Cha!

After a weekend of wrangling my classroom Spanish into a state fit for apartment negotiating, we have landed a lease from a Colombian. No, not a drug lord. We were going to celebrate by going to Tehuitzingo Mexican Deli for huitlacoche tacos in midtown, but after hiking for miles in the urban jungle, we barely collapsed on our couch with greasy bits of Portuguese roast chicken and salt-crusted pork ribs from our new ‘hood drying on our fingertips.

OJ Did It, You Can Too

The best part about going to the mall when I was a kid was getting an Orange Julius before we went inside. ‘Course the counter guy always overloaded the cup with ice cubes so it was mostly ice and orange foam. Creamsicles are nice, but when you’re craving that creamy tang, there’s nothing as satisfying as OJ.

Hawai’ian Hot Pockets

When people think of Hawai’i, they think of palm trees, hula girls, beaches and piña coladas by the mouth of a volcano. When I think of Hawai’i, I envision lau laus at a dive, mixed with luau pit-roasted pigs…ono! That touristy junk in Waikiki really turns me off to Hawai’i, but the island redeems itself in terms of the laid-back culture, local moco, obsession with Spam and Lilikoi passion fruit juice. The real residents of Hawai’i love to eat.

A Chau Bún Riêu Cua

Woe is us! Our favorite Vietnamese sandwich/soup deli in Chinatown is gone! While we were tetsubin (鉄瓶) hunting on Friday, we stopped by to grab a bite. We initially passed it, but we almost got to the corner of the old MOCA building before realizing, hey, wait a minute… It’s been replaced by a jade jewelry store. Augh the travesty!

Soho Slumming Pernil Stir-fry

Two places we eat whenever we’re tourist-ing it up shopping in Soho are Two Boots Pizzeria and La Conquista. Well, actually, the other half had never been to the latter but I had. La Conquista is a Dominican dive that is the last stand for culture and real ethnicity in the Soho area, where the setup along Broadway is basically an outdoor shopping mall, like a poor man’s Rodeo Drive. Boutiques have been pushed to the outer periphery, likewise with cheap eats.

Enter Bear’s Lair

We’re gluttons for punishment. Last week we were meandering along Lenox Ave and happened upon a wine store in the first floor of a newly constructed apartment building. Their selection was small, and the two tastings of rosé and geverztraminer were subpar. The employee told us the trattoria next door was the same owner, and that they deliver from both places. We were fiending for some pizza last night so we ordered the Meatza Meatza pie and waited.

Wiener Schmiener

Growing up, I knew wiener schnitzel as a hot dog chain on Beach Blvd. The chili variety is excellent. These days, there’s even a fried fish dog. What will they think of next? Now imagine my surprise when suddenly one day the other half tells me wiener schnitzel is really a chicken-fried pork cutlet.

Smells Fishy

One of the great cultural landmarks in a Harlem neighborhood is the fish market. Otherwise, they aren’t to be found between there and Chinatown, except in those ridiculously priced sushi-grade joints like at Chelsea market or the Upper West Side Zabar’s where the cheapest flesh is $15/lb. These Harlem jewels are hole-in-the-wall purveyors of not-so-fresh red eyed fish with dirty tanks of old lobsters in the back.

Korean Handmade Noodling

When I think of Korean food, I see seas of seafood pancake and little bowls of kimchi surrounding a charcoal grill in the middle of the table. That’s pretty much what you get when you go to Koreatown, huge dining rooms, two floors of indoor BBQ, or tiny dark places selling tofu and bibimbap, and all the while, blinding reflections off the stainless steel bowls and flatware. What’s up with that stainless steel?

Raw Milk, the Forbidden Fruit

Our knitting friend has out-foodied us for once, by golly. She subscribes to a secret underground network of raw milk enthusiasts. The stuff is trucked in under the radar and dispersed like molten white gold in an undisclosed location every week. So ilicit, of course we wanted in on the action.

Are You a True Blue Foodie?

This article appeared in the January 2009 issue of Australian Gourmet Traveller.

You don’t have to pretend any more. If you’re obsessed with food, here’s your chance to declare it. The love of food isn’t, as a rule, a matter for competition – in the developed world, at any rate. Heck, a great many of us spend a lot of money and plenty of time feeling the burn, saluting the sun and weighing the pros and cons of gastric banding precisely so that our interest in eating isn’t too readily advertised to all and sundry.

Ask Jeju: Microwaving Butter

The food doctor is in. Leave a comment if you have a question.

A friend of a friend asserts that microwaving butter is bad, but fails to mention why. We had never heard of such a thing. Even Harold McGee does not mention such a warning and he is the master of the food science universe. The resident nerd researched it and has the answers.

The Perfect Cup o’ Joe

Just because the other half prefers tea and I only drink decaf doesn’t mean we don’t know how to make the perfect cup of coffee. When I’m craving that bitter, dry-mouth tongue feel, and flower-wilting coffee breath, I still make a nice steaming mug, especially when I’m trying to motivate myself to study.

Secret de Salsa

We dream of eating tomatoes that taste like tomatoes. Not water. Not air. No mealy, rotten, wet styrofoam straight from the supermarket. We’re currently investigating the logistics of hydroponic indoor greenhouse set-ups, or moving to Italy. Either or. Just to get tomatoes that taste like the dirt they are grown in.

Jeju Go To White Castle

We threw a monster birthday surf n’ turf supper bash for the other half last night. It was also the last hurrah in our current abode. T’will be sad to move out soon. We’d just gotten settled in, but duty calls, so onward and upward. We are looking forward to future soirees in the suburbs.

Little Pepper

The Gastronauts led me into a food stupor yesterday. When they ventured to Flushing last, they supped at Little Pepper, a basement dive off the main hub of downtown, nearer to Shea cum Citifield, and across from the tenements by the LIRR. The other half was taking an exam at Queens College in the early A.M., so I tagged along as a break from my studies.

Mexican Beer

Sitting here, chillaxin’, sipping a beer, after exam week and butting heads with school administration. If you want to zone out in style, try Mexican-izing your beer, traditionally Corona in a bottle, with salt sprinkled inside, and a couple dashes of red Tabasco. Squeeze a wedge of lime down the neck. Watch out for the explosion, incoming! Tingly, savory, SWEET

Hear the seagulls?

White Bear Dan Dan Mien

The quintessential dive has cheap decor, a small menu, rock bottom prices, and grumpy service, but the best damned food you crave. For me, that place is White Bear, a Shanghainese  joint in Flushing, and that dish is  擔擔麵. Cousin introduced it to me many moons ago, and now when I go, I must have a plate. The other half feels this way about soup dumplings on Prince St. Good thing these two places are on the same street.

Cast Iron Pancakes

We missed the free pancakes at IHOP (yes there’s an IHOP in Manhattan on 135th St) on Shrove Tuesday, so we made some for breakfast this morning. It was an opportunity to bust out our newest Goodwill kitchen appliance treasure, a Lodge Reversible ProGrid/Iron Griddle. It’s a classic American brand, like Levi’s. Cowboys used to wear Levi’s while cooking on their Lodge cast iron pots hanging over the fire under the moonlight.

All-Purpose Curry

We can all agree that Iron Chef America pales in comparison to the original Japanese version. What is kitchen stadium without the hilarious dubs and voice-overs, not to mention the mind-blowing culinary showdowns of international cuisines amongst Japanese-only chefs? Recently, the states version added wacky sound effects to the chairman’s head twitches and pedantic interviews in the opening segment; alas, it is still  not the same.

Fee this!

Is it the bad economy or just plain greed? Our recent dinner at Tsukushi was marred by the fact the waitress pointed to the magically included tip at the bottom of the hand-written bill. Because it was a good meal and there was pinpoint attentiveness, the 18% tip was well-deserved. But something was just nagging me after that.

Oscarworthy East West Short Ribs

A couple years back, while visiting the Aunt in Santa Cruz, we were gifted a dutch oven. Sitting pretty in vermilion on top of our cabinet for awhile, we were finally prompted to use it when one of our pots konked out. A whole new world of cooking has dawned…

Jewish Champagne

After an afternoon of back-breaking clothes washing the old-fashioned way, a classic beverage is most refreshing. You’d think that by attending a Jewish school and living in the heart of NYC, it’d be easy to imbibe my favorite soda, Dr. Brown’s Cel-ray, but no.  Besides the deepest nooks of the upper east side, I rarely find it anywhere, even at reputable Jewish delis like Sable’s.

Unheavenly Sent From Above

A new development in the hotbed of NYC culinary culture has been the arrival of izakayas. I like to think of them as cousins of tapas bars. But the focus is more on the drink, the food is an afterthought. Wait, that can’t be possible, it’s the Japanese we’re talking about, the ones who fetish-ize everything, especially food. Every morsel should be perfect, the highest quality, as if a gift from heaven, right?

Limey Curd

Are you paying $10 or more for palatable English lemon curd? For less than $3 you can make your own! It’s even better if you use limes. It’s like eating a lemon bar, but with half the guilt. And it takes less time than baking a key lime pie. So tangylicious! I love to spread it on bialys.

Manga Spaghetti

When I was a kid, I read a manga series about a guy who worked as a bus boy and spent his nights behind the restaurant, testing and tasting a super secret sauce that would someday make him rich. He’d slave away in the wee hours, rain or snow, shivering under his blanket next to his makeshift burner and pot of sauce, plotting world domination.

Butter – Now Spreadable

Today we bought a Norpro butter keeper at Marshalls. It’s a little homely, but cheap, and should do what it’s supposed to, make real butter spreadable by keeping it at room temperature. The other half is quite the butter fiend, but can never get enough of it when it’s in the solid cold form. Though I suppose if butter came in popsicle form, it would be quite popular at our apartment.

Nestle Toll House Trick

The perfect chocolate chip cookie. One of my favorites. Want to know the secret? Follow the directions exactly according to the package, though I don’t add the nuts. Then, refrigerate the dough for at least two days, wrapped in saran. This lets the flour absorb the butter on its own sweet time.

Friday the 13th Cooktacular

We had a post-exam party last night. It was supposed to be a smallish dinner gathering, but then ballooned into something barely manageable in terms of having enough decent cutlery and dishware. New Yorkers (or just people in general?) have a penchant for last-minute decision-making, which doesn’t bode well in terms of planning and preparing portions. Even though our guest chef bailed on us so we had to scramble for a menu, things turned out pretty well in the end.

Best Ramen EveR

Nongshim used to make my favorite ramen, Neoguri. It’s the foodie’s ramen, so spicy I only put in half the pack. The noodles are the thickest I’ve encountered, rendering a chewy udon-type QQ. The veggie pack comes with seaweed that grows like sea monkeys once you heat them up. They even carry it at our neighborhood Korean grocer, Young Spring Farm. One day, last month, I cheated.

My Big Fat Zsa-ZEE-kee

One of the places on our list to visit is Santorini, Greece. To find the culture locally, we go to Astoria and partake in the food, not the ‘Greek diners’ which I find distasteful, but the real deal joints that serve the ethnic cuisine. Grilled octopus with a squeeze of lemon can’t be beat. Our usual spot is the greenhouse-like Uncle George’s on the Broadway of Queens, followed by loukoumades around the corner, tiny donut holes piled up and drenched in honey.

Slice Bun FAIL

Yesterday we tried ordering pizza for delivery. We found Slice Bun on our local neighborhood coupon website. Tick tock tick tock; we answered the door, but it was just a friend dropping by, wife in tow. Tick tock tick tock. We waited one hour. The other half called back and the guy said the delivery person stepped onto our block, but fled because he saw a group of black kids sitting on the stoop next door, and is never delivering to our neighborhood again.

Climbing Saint’s Alp 仙跡岩

The closest approximation to being in the mode of a modern Taiwanese teenager is by patronizing the various manga-esque ‘teahouses’ that have sprung up in the city. I’m not talking about serious or hip places like the Tea Room at Takashimaya or Moby’s Teany, I’m writing only of Saint’s Alp Teahouse and its clones – bright, noisy, hip-hop blaring technicolor projections of some kid’s idea of what a place to have bubble tea is — Boba for you Californian etymologists.

Go, Now, Bow Down at the Tosi Temple

As much as we were disappointed by our recent trip to the overrated Batch, we were just as much incredibly wowed by the quality and not underrated desserts we had tonight from Momofuku Milk Bar. Fronted by Pastry Chef Christina Tosi (who is only 27!), baking outside the box is her game. We cannot praise this woman enough. And the bandana theme worn by the staff really takes it to the next level. Go Team! Finally, a piece of cake really worth $5 (besides Cakeman’s red velvet). Fresh, innovative, totally unexpected in texture and taste!

Only Soup For YOU!

Two nights ago, whilst chomping on a juicy pig trotter, I bit down on bone when I thought it was cartilage, and felt my right TMJ twinge; since then, I haven’t been able to open my mouth without pain radiating up and down the right side of my head.

missing maraschino

We here at jeju are big fans of home-made. I believe in almost all instances, home-made is better than store-bought. (The other half disagrees whole-heartedly when it comes to yellow cake mix, but that’s about it). Sometimes I probably take this a bit to extreme (hand-dying yarn in beet juice), but often this propensity treats us very well. Take for instance the wonders of homemade dumplings, steamed bread, or any fresh broth or soup. I’m in the process of making two homemade varieties of vanilla, so why not try to re-create the traditional maraschino cherry?

Bernie’s Irrational Euphoria Dumplings

Bernie Made-Off with my school’s money! In actuality, my money! I still can’t believe my school administration admitted it to us today, to explain why we don’t have rotations for next year in Manhattan. Wow. The media calls it irrational euphoria to describe the people who fell for this Ponzi scheme, like when you can’t believe you fell for a dumb prank like giving someone all your money, or rather the entire collective funds of the government loans of your school’s kids. Well in this case, it would be euphoria of the I’m-out-of-my-mind-furious kind.

Ba Genh, or, Formosa Fish Paste Surprise

It was blizzarding horizontally today. My face was nicely exfoliated by huge, wet, hard pellets of snow on the walk home. Cold, slushy, gross days like this call for something hot, soothing and hearty…Soup! But not just any old soup, a classic Taiwanese staple, Ba Genh, literally, Meat Slurpee – Formosa’s superior version of hot and sour soup. The consistency is less thick than a stew, but more rib-sticking than consommé. A stewsommé?

Recession Special Sticky Buns

Cinnabon are the best, Pillsbury, the worst, but hey it’s recession time, so I gotta start making my own to save time and money. Can’t always zip down to Penn Station when I get the craving. The best sticky bun I’ve had recently was in Door County, WI last summer, when we tromped through the mosquito-infested woods one morning to get some at the Swedish campground cafeteria next door. It was totally worth the welts and malaria.

Super Bowl Bananaphone Guacamole

Listen to the classic Raffi song while reading this post. Today is the Australian Open Men’s Final: Federer v. Nadal. Oh, and the Super Bowel. For me, it’s all about the snacks and the commercials. Football always reminds me of the parties in high school where I served beer and hot dogs to the elderly at the senior center near my condo. They had a slightly illicit air about them, given that I was underage and unsupervised while I plied oldies with alcohol. Volunteerism at its finest.

Norihiko Manabe’s Tsukushi

Donguri has been kicked to the curb! Last night, we encountered something close to rapture at Tsukushi, a homestyle bar recommended by The Japanese Food Report and other reviewers on Yelp. We had been disappointed the last time we were at Donguri for a birthday dinner, so we couldn’t really fork over that kind of cash on it again, hoping it might return to its former glory. But now, all is well in the land of the rising sun, for Tsukushi has saved the day.

Cháozhōu Cocaine Chicken 潮州鹵水鸡

Cháozhōu, Chiu Chow, Teochew, however you phoneticize it, for me, it’s YUM. There’s a spot in Chinatown that seems directly transported from the factory of dingy dives serving comfort food. It’s reminiscent of my distant memory of trips to Taiwan, a country that teeters between high-tech commerce and dirt roads, creaky cramped stairwells and that omnipresent greenish glow of flickering fluorescence against ceramic tile walls. That place close to my heart is New Bo Ky. 

Savory Steel-Cut Oatmeal Skirlie

I didn’t grow up with much of a sweet tooth. It wasn’t cultivated as much as kids from the European tradition. I didn’t even really eat cereal for breakfast until college. Then I ate it for lunch and dinner too. As for oatmeal? I think I tried one of those Quaker microwaveable packets once and nearly puked. Hot artificial fruity flavors, ugh. AND total violation of my anti-mushy rule. Enter McCann’s steel cut oats in that handsome cylindrical tin.

Kueh Sanur

An ex-roommate  introduced me to kueh talam several years ago at a Malaysian dive called Sanur in Chinatown that has two levels of food service. The basement serves dishes to order under greenish fluorescent lighting at ~7 tables. The street level displays traditional desserts by the window and also offers cafeteria-style dining for those on the run, 3 sides with rice for under $4. Whenever we make a trip to Chinatown, we always stop to buy the kueh, even if it’s out of the way. No one else makes this type in NYC that I’ve encountered. Maybe a dive nestled somewhere in the heart of Queens…

Taiwanese Beef Noodle Slurp

Another treasure from my trove of family recipes surprisingly not available in restaurants is Taiwanese beef noodle soup. This is perhaps also one of the few famous beef dishes in the cuisine. The closest we’ve come to the authentic is Happy Beef Noodle House in Flushing. The other half enjoys the niú nǎn 牛腩 version which comes with tendon instead of chunks of meat. A new wrinkle I learned is the addition of chopped up sour mustard green or preserved vegetable as an accompaniment. Must be a Mainlander thing.

Gong Xi Fah Tsaii

Hong Bao Na Lai 红包拿来! Ah, if only the second line were still applicable. Money in red envelopes was the highlight of this holiday when I was a kid. Last night was our Chinese New Year’s celebration. Usually we head down to Chinatown for a Malaysian feast at Nonya, but yesterday we ate lunch at Overseas Taste restaurant in the east side of the neighborhood beyond Manhattan bridge, where the tourists don’t roam, before heading back to the more well-known section to shop for goodies for our potluck dinner hosted by our Puerto Rican/Singporean friends.

Rice is Nice

But it’s joy with soy! Ha, an old two line poem I still get a kick out of. When I want to be lazy, my rice cooker is there for me. So easy, just pour in the rice and add water up to where it says how many cups of rice you plopped in.  We have a cheap-o Oster rice cooker from Target. I grew up with a very basic National one, without bells and whistles that come with the new-fangled models. It does the job just fine.

Coke is It, Ain’t It?

Nothing squeaks more of Americana and trailer-trash cooking to me than Coca-cola chicken, a stew made with the soda. When I was in Florida building houses for Habitat for Humanity, a volunteer gave me the recipe which I scribbled down on a stained piece of yellow legal pad paper. I haven’t cooked it in recent years since I don’t really drink soda anymore. Too sweet. I prefer grapefruit Izze or making my own soda from seltzer and Ikea elderberry syrup. Why trailer trash?

Catered by…Trader Joe’s

Trader Joe’s has been hit or miss lately. Sure we love the dairy products, namely their vanilla yogurt, string cheese and the newish Greek yogurt, and we find their quality to be comparable to the Whole Foods generic brand 365. But some of the stuff have been real dogs, especially the meat. Thanks to Trader Joe’s, our Thanksgiving last year was nearly ruined.

I Have a Dream

We went skiing this weekend at Mountain Creek, a relatively new resort in Vernon, New Jersey, where they sank millions into this nouveau-faux-Bavarian lodge with heated outdoor pools and gondola lifts on three mountains. There’s even a baby half-pipe being constructed at the base of one of the slopes. The one thing they skimped out on was the food court, little better than ones found in malls, more like a cattle pen. I think they subscribe to the McDonald’s philosophy of ‘if you make the amenities uncomfortable and unattractive, it’ll get the customers in an out faster.’

#44: Pres. Barack Obama ‘Yes, We Can’ Meatballs

In honor of the inauguration and in keeping with the current trend of naming everything after Obama in order to make a buck, I offer to you the Obama Yes, We Can Meatballs. Instead of rejecting pork when he gets into office, you can be sure that Obama will do everything in his power to grab ahold of the pork in Congress and incorporate it into his master plan, recycle it, and present it in a new manner which will work in his favor, maybe even benefit our country, just like these meatballs. You take a little bit of this, a little bit of that, and keep all your constituents happy.

Boiled No-Knead Sourdough Bagelry

Our resident plumber fixed a leak in the kitchen sink last night, and also brought back in the bag of hardware goodies, an oven thermometer. According to this little gadget, our electric oven is off — cooler by a good 40 degrees or so. No wonder we have problems when we bake! Today’s project is no-knead bagels, done the right way: boiled then baked.

Sake to Me

Part deux of last night’s romp in the Lower East Side: after-dinner stroll in Astor Place, so many new shops have sprung up since I was last there. Minca itself was new-ish, considering we had dined a couple years ago at the Italian dive next door and remembered there was a boutique or bakery of some sort in that same location instead. Given the economy and the frigid chill, many tiny stores were open, but devoid of shoppers.

Top Momofuku

Last night turned out to be a tour of Japan. We had dinner at Minca the Ramen Factory in the East Village, which Rameniac raved about. Me, meh, not a fan of viscous liquids, except for kefir-type beverages. Yogurt, especially the vanilla from Trader Joe’s, I like. But soups with consistency of stews, thick, nauseously unctuous, topped with fat-laced braised pork belly, really not my cup of tea.

Caffeine Addicts Anonymous

Yes, it’s legal, but it’s bad. It ruins lives. There are programs to quit, but like alcohol, another other legal drug, it seems cool to flaunt how addicted you are. Nicotine, the third of the holy trinity, has lost its allure thanks to the incessant advertising campaigns against it. But I am proud to say that I have quit the stuff for good; I still enjoy the occasional cup o’ joe, albeit decaf, and now I’m happy I don’t get the buzz, because that means I also won’t suffer the withdrawl. A good 8 hour night’s sleep is the true prescription to keeping the wolves at bay. There’s no shortcuts without consequences.

Soylent Green is……

The arguments vegans make for not eating meat goes out both ears for us. In fact, I think people give up meat because they don’t know what good food laced liberally with meat is. Take, for example, one half of jeju, who once declared vegetarianism to prevent the parental gavaging of hamsteak down the throat as a child. After three long years (1,095 days or 1,576,800 minutes) of meatlessness, the smell of grilled bratwurst at a summer BBQ broke the dam, and the the meat-filled waters of real food reigned once again.

Freshly Squeezed Soy Milk

Silk and its myriad clones have basically ruined soy milk for us. Instead of celebrating the wonderful nutty earthiness of the natural bean flavor, American manufacturers decided to make an alterna-milk, producing a white liquid that is bland, artificially-flavored to taste like fake vanilla or chocolate, and achieving the goal of turning off a whole new generation of kids to the real thing.

Bee Tai Buhck: *Special* Rice Noodle

The mainstay of Taiwanese cuisine is a simple dish of ground pork braised in soy sauce. Brother and I would eat it all the time in boxed lunches when I was growing up, with other braised accompaniments: tofu skin, egg, chicken, etc… Other kids always liked to peep into our lunches to see what weird thing we were eating that day. It served as the go-to quick meal on top of rice anytime Mother wanted to feed us hungry hungry hippos, but man, it is so fantastic.

Dinuguan Rah Rah!

All this talk of vinegar in savories and sweets brings up the cuisine that is the queen of tang: Filipino food, and the one dish that embodies all that I love about ethnic cuisine, dinuguan. This guisado of blood and innards represents my belief that a collection of flavors becomes more than the sum of its parts. There is speculation that this dish was descended from the Spartans, that legendary race of men who subsisted on the Atkin’s diet. Gives new insight into why they were so bloodthirsty, right?

Red (yes red!) Velvet Cake

We like red velvet cake. A lot. I make it several times a season, and we sample the fare every time we see it.

Today we went to Batch on Waverly Place – Serious Eats offered promising tastes. We were disappointed. For starters, the cupcake wasn’t red! We like our red velvet cake red. Bright RED. Shockingly red!

Supermac n’ Cheese

Today was a day of rest. We had some food destinations in mind and set off mid-morning on our jaunt. We usually bypass midtown but happened to be walking along 7th ave when we were lucky enough to see Monsieur Le Chat peeking out across from the F.I.T. That put a smile on our face, since it was after we ate at Supermac, a specialty mac and cheese place that was worse than Noodles & Company, worse even than the Ikea pseudo-Scandinavian slop!

Vitamin Water, aka Soup du Jour

Everyone on Serious Eats goes ga-ga over Banh Mi, the pickled pork-hammy Vietnamese sandwich, but no one seems to talk about the cornerstone of the cuisine, the soups. Our spot in Chinatown, A Chau Deli, is a tiny Ma and Pa shop with three Ikea Franklin high chairs for ’seating’ while you wait for your take out order. The menu is individually ink-jet printed and taped on the wall behind the counter.

Distrito Federal Tacos

I can say without reservation that we make THE best tacos in New York City, the soft corn tortilla version like the ones the vendors sell in Mexico City. I’d throwdown with any restaurant or street vendor in the Latin world to defend this claim. We’ve sampled an enormous variety in the city and elsewhere, and we’ve taken all the best elements from each to come up with a soul-satisfying recipe we have at least several times a month. We even have special square taco plates we picked up at a craft fair in New Jersey that we only use for this entree.

Taiwanese Meat Ball Pie (Ba-Wan 肉圓)

I’m watching Michael Chiarello’s show Easy Entertaining; the Food Network and HGTV are my two channels to flip on when I want some background noise. He’s like the cool uncle, the guy who makes everything look easy peasy, never breaking a sweat. He’s the Fonz, grown up, who decided to get a job and make something of himself. The show is a little schmaltzy, all pseudo-Tuscan and Napa, but he seems like a mellow dude.

Misfortune Cookies

With the coming of the Year of the Tiger at the end of the month, my thoughts turned to fortune cookies today. In the tradition of demotivation posters, what if there were fortune cookies that had facetious messages in them instead of the cheesy sayings that you usually find?

Bagel and Shmear

Where can you get the best bagel? New York City? Before I answer, I’d like to assure you this blog is not supported by a certain city’s tourism board, even though many of the past posts have been about this city. We just happen to be bi-coastal, though the second coast is Lake Michigan. I grew up in Huntington Beach, CA, and went to college in Cambridge, MA, but due to forces beyond my control, the Midwest seems to be where I find myself when I’m not in Manhattan. But I digress…

Almost Teetotaler

Because of my very low tolerance of alcohol, I never really got into the bar scene. One shot of hard liquor (I used to like tequila) or 1/2 a beer (pilsner or stout) is all it takes to get me drunk. Then I met my other half and was introduced to wine. Here now was a sub-culture of drinking where ‘tasting’ was encouraged, quality not quantity. So the last several years, I actually look foward to drinking wine, especially at wine-tastings, because it’s okay to try many different bottles and pour out the stuff you don’t like.

Steamed Bread (Mantou 饅頭)

Why do people in their 20s+ not know how to cook? Most of our friends and acquaintances don’t. I think if you like to eat, you should like to cook. Sure it’s convenient to buy the stuff ready to eat instead, but it never tastes as good as the homemade version. Case in point: steamed bread. Yes it’s labor intensive, and more steps than I usually prefer when cooking, but it’s worth the trouble. Plus you can skip the trip to the gym that day.

Eat Me

Recently we discovered an American cook who employs the do whatever the heck you feel like method when cooking: Kenny Shopsin. He has a new book out called Eat Me, which we asked for, and received, from Santa. He owned a General Store on the Lower East Side for many years, and then somehow started cooking in his store which eventually led to his new location in the Essex market where he mostly watches over his kids who are now cooking for him. In fact, his book is a family affair too. One kid photographed it, another designed it, and yet another helped write it.

Hidden Kitchens

A recent purchase from Frugal Muse was not a cookbook, but a book about hidden kitchens based on a NPR series by The Kitchen Sisters. I don’t remember what the last novel I read was; these days, I prefer non-fiction literature. I like cookbooks that blur the line between telling stories and sharing recipes.

Cookbooks

Not only do we love to eat, we also collect cookbooks. See the way we cook is not to have set recipes and always make things according to a formula (that’s reserved for baking, sometimes). We actually just stock up our pantry periodically of stuff we like to eat, and cook meals based on what we have left in the fridge. Reading cookbooks is not only a hobby, but a way to develop a repository of methods and figure out how ingredients go together.

Vom Fass and Penzey’s

There’s a strip mall that was recently renovated across from the Whole Foods in Madison on University Ave that houses two of our favorite stores we must visit whenever we’re in town: Penzey’s Spices and Vom Fass.

Macarons, NOT macaroons

Macarons might be my favorite dessert. They are light and qq, with delicate flavors. While there are several bakeries in Manhattan that specialize in these delights, but they have nothing on the fresh, home-made version. I have been greatly disappointed, even by the most famous French bakeries…

We’re turning Japanese

We love Japan.

1. The people are obsessed about food, always a plus

2. Udon and its skinnier brethren (the only real good QQ udon is the frozen kind, which you flash cook just until the strands separate, of which we always buy at Tokyo Mart, formerly Tongyin Mart, in Manhattan Chinatown)

Xmas Eve Hors D’oeuvres

The tradition during the Christmas Eve present opening marathon is each participant must prepare an hors d’oeuvre we can munch on to maintain our stamina for the >3hr affair.

Trader Joe’s

Trader Joe’s was the precursor to Whole Foods; before organic was ‘in,’ they were making grass roots products that were tasty and wholesome. We used to live across the street from one growing up, and going there was always a special treat.

Pork on My Fork

In the Midwest, the pork revolution has already come and stayed. In NYC, it’s suddenly all the rage. But whereas “pancetta” or roast suckling piglet is the focus here, there, people don’t like to know about what they’re eating. Just pound it flat and fry it up. Hence the modern weiner schnitzel, or pork tenderloin.

Bedouin Tent

We were looking into Brooklyn co-housing (adult commune) last month and happened to eat at the only place near the meeting site in Boereum Hill. We had no idea what the place was called. There was just a round sign hanging by two chain link stubs with a big P-I-T-A written in a serifed font. Today we went back just for the pita, and the football-sized merguez, a spicy lamb sausage, done without casing here.

Maid Rite

road trip to grandma quincy from mad, wi to quincy, il thru iowa and missouri, and the closest thing to a local diner was actually a franchise with rock bottom prices. alton brown went for the maid rite, a ground beef tomato sauceless sloppy joe, but we had pork tenderloins and a tilapia sandwich.

Eats, May or May Not be Serious

Are you hungry? We are. Let’s eat! We’ll write about stuff we eat and maybe other things too.